♥ JOLEEN ♥

TURNING POINTS?

TURNING POINTS?

I seriously felt that things are getting worst.

im drifting away from love because of you.
im drifting away from you because of you.

i dont understand what is the true meaning of love anymore.

it used to be sweet and good but things are turning and changing for the worse.

whats the point of all the quarrels when you don't understand what i really want?
whats the point of promising everything when you couldn't do anything?
whats the point of saying when you ain't doing?
whats the point of giving in to me when you don't really want/meant it?

im on the verge of giving up, im on the edge of throwing everthing away.

you used to be this but now you're that, a changed man indeed.

i tell myself, why cry when i know you don't bother anymore.
why bother when you don't bother as well.
why get angry when you don't give a shit.
why get frustrated when you do it on purpose.
why stop myself from say "i don't want this anymore" just bcos you said you don't like it.
why talk to you when we don't communicate anymore, at all.

i just can't do it.
i feel splited.

a side of me ready to give everything up cause i know, that things ain't the same anymore.
a side of me unwilling to give up everything for we've been thru so much all these years and it's just not right to give up.
but i know years of being together CANNOT be the reason to hang on when you know something can't work out.

why doesnt a r/s have to change overtime? why does it even have to?
why can't it remains as it was like from the very beginning?
everything to us was sweet melodies and beautiful sceneries.
we make up after each and every quarrels knowing that we don't mean what we say at all.
but now, i know we meant what we say.
words has become more and more harsh and the touch of reality scares me.
Everything you said to me meant something to me but do you feel the same way?

i know you wouldn't be reading what im writing like how you used to read my blog every now and then. but tell me (if you're reading this), what exactly is happening?

i feel so lonely at times although i've got a bf.

i need someone to share.
i need someone to love.
i need someone to talk.
i need someone to hug.
i need someone to joke and laugh.

but all these are obviously in the past.

funny thing, we don't even talk over dinner anymore.
all you do and look at your phone and start playing with it.
we don't even communicate anymore.
you just kept quiet whenever i talk to me.
as time passes, i hate talking to you.
i hate it when you don't answer me.
i hate it when you don't talk to me.
i hate it when i feel pitiful of myself.

11:23:00 pm ·